How to Fix Communication Problems in Marriage for Stronger Relationships

Having good communication between your couple is key to having a happy marriage. Many couples struggle to have good communication to this can cause little arguments to get out of control. By learning some communication skills you can improve your relationship and become closer as a couple.

Why Communication Issues Occur In Marriage

When you struggle with communication in a relationship it is usually a slow build up of issues. Often due to high stress, busy lives or unexpressed feelings. Partners will no longer want to listen to eachother, creating assumptions and confusion.

Often communication issues occur due to being distracted by phone, not being able to move on from past arguments, and not being able to express our needs well. With one person not wanting to talk and another wanting to have a discussion. This creates a divide resulting in both partners not feeling heard or valued by each other.

7 Ways to Improve Communication Problems In A Marriage

1. Practice Active Listening Without Interrupting

When your partner is speaking you need to actively listen. Don’t try and plan what you’re going to say. Make eye contact, nod when appropriate and don’t interrupt. Once they have finished talking you should summarise what they’ve said e.g They’re feeling stressed as I didn’t help with dinner. This assures them that you genuinely care and reduces confusion.

2. Use “I” Statements

Using blaming statements can be offputting, so instead ask yourself why they’re doing this. Take “You never listen.” and turn it into “I always feel I’m not heard when I’m telling you about my day.” Using "I" creates less confrontation both partners will feel respected. Improving communication by not picking a fight with your partner.

3. Pick A Good Time And Place To Communicate

You wouldn’t want to have a big conversation if you were angry, busy or tired. Choose a time when you’re both relaxed. Switch off your TV and put your phones away. Having a quiet place to talk will create less anxiety. Such as talking in the living room after dinner. Ensuring you talk at the right time can avoid turning a small conversation into an argument.

4. Stick To One Topic

One of the biggest mistakes in relationships is bringing up old issues. If you’re discussing cleaning around the house don’t mention an issue from last month. Sticking to one topic will create clear communication.

5. Be Empathetic

Try to understand how they’re feeling even if you disagree. Let them know you understand by saying things such as "I can see why you’d feel that way." and "That must have been tough for you." This will show that even if you don’t agree you respect how they feel. People tend to calm down knowing that they’re being understood.

6. Know When To Take A Timeout

If your argument is getting too heated then taking a timeout is a good idea. Tell them you’ll be back in 20 mins once you’ve calmed down. During this time you could take deep breaths, go for a walk or have a glass of water. Don’t use this as a punishment. This will allow you to return having a calm mind so you can talk with love.

7. Be Appreciative

Always create positive communication. Thank them for the little things, compliment them and tell them you love them. Taking time everyday to thank them will create emotional connection with your partner and make hard conversations easier.

How to Build Trust With Small Communication Habits

Building a strong relationship will come from small habits throughout your day. Try to have 15 mins everyday to have a conversation with your partner. Ask them how their day was and truly listen. Have a weekly catch up to discuss your relationship, money and future plans. Be truthful even with tricky subjects but always be kind. Building trust overtime through small habits.

Final Thoughts

Improving communication within your relationship will take time, patience and working as a team. It’s not about winning an argument but understanding each other better. Everything improves when both partners make a commitment to being a good listener, speaking kindly and establishing boundaries with distractions. Remember happy relationships aren’t with perfect people who can communicate perfectly, they’re with imperfect people who learn to communicate with love perfectly.